by Karen Frazier

I have a lot of people ask me about the things they see on paranormal television. One of the common questions goes a little something like this: "Have you ever been possessed or attacked like you see on the television shows?"

I've certainly had intense contact with spirits, but I've never experienced anything that I would consider an attack or possession.

As paranormal researchers, we enter haunted locations with the intent of engaging any ghosts that might be there. We invite this engagement in multiple ways, such as asking them directly to communicate with us or trying to capture instrumental readings suggestive of their presence. We do so because we'd like to learn the source of the reported activity. Therefore, if a spirit does attempt to communicate, then we have met our goals. 

Sometimes, the spirits are unable to communicate in the ways we would like them to, so they attempt to reach us in other ways. For example, one of the ways I am able to perceive spirits is through physical and emotional sensations. These feelings aren't always pleasant, but they are effective at relaying a message.

I'll give you an example. Last summer I was doing a walk-through for a potential client. When I entered the client's bedroom, I got an intense headache. The room immediately started to spin and I had the sensation of blacking out and falling to the floor. This series - intense headache, three room spins, black out, hit the floor, continued on a loop.

Lori, who was with me on the walk-through, noticed some paintings on the wall and asked the homeowner where she got them. The homeowner said they had belonged to her step mother. 

When she told us this, the sensations grew stronger.

"Is your step mother dead?" I asked her. 

When the homeowner confirmed the step mother had died, I asked if she'd died from something to the head like a stroke or an aneurysm. It turned out she'd died of a stroke. As soon as the homeowner confirmed this was the case to me, the physical sensations went away.

I've had this situation occur many times. For instance, my heart will hurt, my breathing will labor, or I'll feel stabbing pains in various locations. These pains frequently correspond with how someone died. While they are intense in the moment, as soon as I get confirmation about them, they disappear.

With the intensity of these interactions, I can certainly understand how someone might perceive them as a possession or an attack, but I don't believe that is what they are. I think the sensations are intense in order to get my attention. I also believe that the sensations disappear as soon as I confirm their cause, because the message has been delivered.

I've had other experiences that others might perceive as possessions or attacks, as well. For example, on one investigation I felt intense fear and sadness and my body grew very cold. I began to shake, and I just wanted to hold myself and wail and rock. Once I'd pieced together what was happening (a spirit was communicating a frightening and intense experience in which he'd died) and spoke about it to the people with me, the sensations went away. 

On other investigations, I've been poked, grabbed, and pushed. I've had my hair pulled and things thrown at me. I believe it would be very easy to misinterpret these experiences, because they appear very aggressive and almost hostile in nature. However, I believe it is the aggressiveness of these actions that got my attention and allowed me to learn more about the spirits in those locations - which was, after all, exactly the reason I was there in the first place.

The way I see it, the spirits are limited in how they can communicate with us, but we constantly enter their space and invite them to do so. They communicate in the best way they can, and sometimes those communications may feel unpleasant or frightening. 

Even if you're not seeking out communication with a spirit, such as a ghost in your home or business, they may be pulling out all the stops to get you to pay attention. If you don't notice, they may double down in their attempts, which may feel very aggressive. If you are having frightening experiences that you believe may be associated with a ghost in your home or business, there are a few things you can do.

1. Contact us. We'd be happy to assess your situation and help you find explanation or ways to cope.
2. Ignore it and hope it goes away. In some cases, this works. In other cases, it causes the activity to ramp up until you pay attention.
3. Acknowledge the activity and firmly set boundaries. Say something such as, "I know you are here and trying to get my attention, but this is my home. Please leave me alone."  or "Please don't bother my kids or pets." The key is to firmly set a boundary and take charge of your environment. 
4. It should be noted that option 3 is different than actually inviting communication, which can increase activity. It's best not to open the lines of communication with spirits in your home or business because this can bring about an increase in activity, as well.